Being the one who always texts first on the phone with someone who never texts you first is tough, but it’s not uncommon.
Why Does it Matter?
You are having second thoughts about whether or not she really likes or is attracted to you.
What Would you Do?
Imagine this scenario: It is two months into the relationship when Bob realizes that Emily never texts him first. He wakes up one morning and reaches for his phone. As he starts to type, he sees it was he who sent the last message. And just then, the realization hits. She never texts him first.
He thinks he is just overreacting and so gives it time. He doesn’t text her. The first day passes, and she still doesn’t text him. And then the second.
If you were Bob, what would you do?
1. Stop Being Insecure
This is the first thing you should do. Stop being insecure. Even though it might be true that she never texts you (it likely is), there is also that tiny bit of a possibility that it is all in your head.
So, work on your insecurities. This does not mean you should beat yourself up for feeling this way. It means you should accept how you feel and grow not to be bothered much by it.
Like Bob, you should observe her actions. This means you should give it a few more days. Go without speaking to her for as long as you can. If she still does not text, then you will be faced with two options:
– Confront, or
– Move on.
For many guys, it is best you move on. But this depends on the scenario.
When reading articles on the internet, you should be careful only to take advice when the scenario is peculiar to yours because life is objective.
There are no rules.
If you have just met her, then it is best to move on—as a woman’s never texting a man means she is not quite interested in him.
Confront her only when you both have had this going on for a while and you are sure that she likes you. In a non-judgemental tone, ask her why she has not been texting you.
If you can, infuse some humor. The last thing you want to do is confront her in a way that makes her feel unsafe.
3. Begin to Love Your Own Company
This seems unrelated, but it is quite helpful. You see, when you love your own company, a lot is going to change about you, including how you perceive a woman’s response to you.
4. Accept That it’s May Not Work Out
If she never texts you first, it signifies she doesn’t like you. So it will help if you do some work to accept that it is true. The heart wants what it wants and can rarely be swayed to do otherwise.
Don’t fantasize that you will be able to change her mind to like you. See her never texting you first as a sign that it’s over.
5. Ignore it
The next possible thing you can do is ignore the fact that she never texts you, at least for your mental health. Act like nothing is up. In fact, don’t even wait for her to text. Text her when you feel like talking to her.
And as long as she is responsive to you, keep the conversation going.
Also, don’t depend too much on texting in your relationship. Set up real-life meetings as often as possible. Text little. Meet much.
Unfortunately, most times, if a girl never texts you first, you may not be able to change her mind. Your only approach to this is to accept the truth that she’s never interested in you. She probably has someone else. You either sever ties with her and move on or talk to her about it.
Photo by Taylor Grote on Unsplash