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5 Ways to Find Yourself Again in a Relationship

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Feeling lost in a relationship? Read on to learn how to find yourself again.

A lot of times, relationships can overwhelm us, so we start to feel lost in them. That is, we begin to lose sight of our own lives. Many of us have been in that place a couple of times. In this article, you’re going to see how you can find yourself again if you are feeling lost in a relationship.

1. Start with Your Body

I always recommend exercise because exercise does not only develop your body; it goes on to offer some mental clarity. 

If you feel lost in a relationship, then it is time to pay attention to your body. This doesn’t necessarily mean you should hit the gym. You can exercise even at home. The important thing is that you spend some time with yourself routinely. 

Exercise for a couple of minutes, establishing some kind of commitment to the activity. In time, you will find that you become a bit more self-aware and focused. The main pointer of self-discovery is self-awareness. 

Read: 10 Questions to Help You Discover Yourself

2. Develop a Secure Attachment

Attachment patterns can influence us real good or real bad. If you are attached to your partner in a way that makes you feel like you need to be validated by them all the time, then it is likely the reason you are losing yourself in the relationship. 

Find a way to validate yourself and believe it. 

Don’t depend on praises from your partner all the time. Praise yourself. Look in the mirror and swoon at how amazing you are. This will help you find yourself again in your relationship.

Read: 10 Steps To Building Your Self-Esteem

3. Journal

Journaling is such healthy practice and one of the ways you can rediscover yourself if you are feeling lost in a relationship. 

Basically, journaling helps you become aware of your feelings and your actions, which is just being self-aware. 

Get a journal. Keep it to yourself; your partner does not have to see it. Now, develop a habit of writing all your feelings in this journal. 

Write your feelings this way: 

  • What you feel 
  • Why you might be feeling it
  • How you can get over it. 

For example, you can say: 

Today, I feel:

  • Inadequate 
  • I feel this way because Jeff hasn’t spoken to me since morning. 
  • I should not think about it much. I think I am amazing. He loves me. I should go get lunch. 

4. Go Back to Your Hobbies

In the early stages of some relationships, it is possible to lose sight of your own hobbies. 

Well, now is the time you go back to those hobbies. If you used to love literature, then please go back to writing and reading. If you used to love golf, then find your way back to the field. 

Do stuff that makes you feel like you have gotten your life back. Please note that this may at first put a strain on your relationship and make your partner uncomfortable. But over time, they will get used to it. 

Read: The Importance of Self-Care and Why it Matters

5. Talk to Your Partner

Healthy relationships are partnerships and teamwork. If you are trying to get your life back together, your partner is sure going to be of great help. 

Boundaries do a lot of good. Just tell him or her how you feel, and then you both build boundaries to help each other. You will rediscover yourself again in the relationship in no time.  

Photo by Ashley Byrd on Unsplash

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By Martin Corden

Martin Corden is a certified relationship expert and a songwriter from Australia. He loves researching and writing. Martin loves finding new ways to improve and inspires others to be their best version and work together towards it. Martin has a wide range of intellectual and artistic interests.

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