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10 Signs Your Date May Not Show Up on the First Date

by | Dating Tips

Last updated May 11, 2022 | Published on May 13, 2022

Can’t figure out whether your date will show up on the first date? You’re not alone.

When you have been talking to someone for a while and have established some kind of rapport with them, it is only normal that you try to move things out of your phone screen. That is, set up a real-life date. While many first dates go as planned, others don’t because one party fails to show up. What will it be for you?

According to relationship experts, here are 10 signs that your date may not show up on the first date, so you’ll never have to wonder if they are coming or not. 

1. They Have Been Giving You Mixed Signals

By mixed signals, we mean they act in a way that makes it quite difficult to tell for certain if they are interested in you. One minute they are all over your inbox, weaving paragraphs and paragraphs, and the next, they are AWOL. No warnings. Nothing. They just disappear on you like that.

If they can go missing on you like this on the media or over the phone, then it is a big indicator that they can do the same in real life. 

Before you set up that date, be sure that they are giving you strong signals that suggest they want to meet and spend time with you. 

Read: 10 Signs That Reveal You have Chemistry With Someone

2. They Have Hinted That They Feel Uncomfortable Around New People

Sometimes, your partner might really want to see you but will fail to show up on a date because they are uncomfortable with meeting new people. This happens a lot. 

These such people could agree to show up for the date at the stipulated time but, boom, a last-minute call that they can’t make it anymore. 

If the person you are currently talking to has at any point suggested that they have a problem meeting new people, then it is likely that they may not show up at the first meeting.

3. You Think They Have a Partner

A lot of times, even people who have a partner flirt over the media. They do this for the fun of it and have no intentions of making it serious.

If you suspect that the person you are talking to has a partner, then realize that it is possible that they may not show up on the first date. 

This is especially if the date has always been your idea. They might come if they set up the date themselves. But you? If you set up the date yourself, they may not show up. 

4. You’ve Been Turned Down Before

If your date has turned you down before, it simply means that they are not that interested in meeting you. People who are very interested in meeting you will agree to come to meet you the moment you bring it up. 

If they turned you down, though, and for some reason, you tried to set up another date, they would only tell you, yes, to get you off their backs. On the day of the date, they won’t show up. 

When someone turns down a date with you, the ideal thing to do is wait for them to set the next date themselves.

5. They Are Far Away

A lot of times, distance is what makes first dates fail. Acknowledge that even though your date may be very interested in meeting you, they may not show up if they are too far away from you. 

This is especially if other factors influence their movement. Like the weather, security, etc. 

6. Late Replies

Be wary of someone who often responds to your chats late because when the time reaches to meet them, they will certainly most likely not show up on the first meeting. They will ghost you at the meeting point. 

Their messages will always come a few minutes too late. For someone who will someday disappoint you, they will never take you seriously. 

You will experience these late responses in the morning, afternoon, evening, and even during the night. Their excuses are that they are busy at work in the morning and afternoon. They will say they are busy cooking in the evening, and at night, they may often blame it on tiredness.

One way or the other, they have flimsy excuses for responding to your messages very late. When your online date behaves this way, know you’re not their priority. The chances are that they will definitely disappoint you on the first date.

7. Always Busy Doing Something

Have you tried to call this person, and they often say, “I’ll call you back, I’m on the road, or I’m in a meeting right now?” If you always get a response such as this one, it’s going to be a no-show date. They may not show up if you arrange to meet them in person.

Like the late replies we mentioned earlier, you’re also not a priority at all to them. Because if you are, they will surely find time in their busy schedule to talk to you. Maybe not when they are working but when they are at home in the evening.

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Are you the one who always initiates the conversations? Are you the one who always checks in on them throughout the week? If you are, then you’re rarely on their mind. It’s better to let them go because they may not bother showing up on the first date—there is no need to invest your time in them.

8. You’ve Caught Them in a Lie Too Often

Relationships are built on trust. When two people are trying to get to know each other on the internet, they should be honest. If they are lying about themselves to you, you shouldn’t go on to trust whatever they say.

They probably have a serious relationship already and are hiding this from you. Also, as long as they have lied about a number of things in the past, there’s no stopping them from doing a no-show.

Only trust someone who communicates honestly and acts unselfishly.

9. You Know Very Little About Them

How much do you know about this person? Enough? If not, don’t bother arranging a meeting with them because they may not show up. There is a reason why they withheld detailed information about themselves.

It could be that they have something to hide. It could also be that they are just playing with your feelings. To them, it’s a game of chatting up someone and playing with their emotions.

Before you meet someone you’re already dating online, ensure you know much about them, like what kind of work they do, what they like, etc. 

10. Keeps Postponing the Meeting

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So far, so good; everything with your potential partner is going great. Now, it’s time to meet. How have they postponed the meeting? If they do this more than once, just have it at the back of your mind that they may not show up if they promise to at the next meeting.

There are many reasons why they do this. 

  • They are not ready to meet. 
  • Low self-esteem
  • They aren’t serious about the relationship
  • They aren’t who they say they are
  • They have someone else they’re chatting with and are undecided who they should date.

All of these could be why they keep posting you. Even if this person finally decides to meet up, the likelihood that they will turn up is very slim. They could choose to turn back and go back home even at the last minute.

Photo by Thirdman on Pixels

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By Martin Corden

Martin Corden is a certified relationship expert and a songwriter from Australia. He loves researching and writing. Martin loves finding new ways to improve and inspires others to be their best version and work together towards it. Martin has a wide range of intellectual and artistic interests.

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