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15 Signs He Only Wants to Hook Up

by | Meeting People, Moving On

Published on May 24, 2022

Hook up culture has been around for a while. Guys prefer to just hook up for a number of reasons, the most outstanding one being the disinterest in commitment and the responsibilities that come with being in an actual sexual relationship. Here are 15 signs he will show if he only wants to hook up with you.

1. You Meet on Tinder

Obviously, guys who sign up for dating apps are most times trying to hook up. Yes, one can find love, and I mean genuine love, that blooms into a healthy relationship on a dating site. But, it is not as common as hooking up. 

If you met this guy on Tinder, then there is a big chance he only wants to hook up, especially if his Tinder profile is the perfect ‘playboy’ profile. You know, bare-chested pictures with a splash of muscle and seduction here and there. 

2. He Hasn’t Been in an Actual Relationship For a Long Time

Guys who want to hook up just want to hook up. That’s it. They have little to no interest in being in a relationship. They want to get the sex, but they don’t want the commitment. 

If your guy tells you, he hasn’t been in a relationship for a very long time, that’s an amber flag right there. 

Ask him why. If he gives you concrete reasons, like: “I don’t want a relationship yet because I don’t yet have the funds for it…” he might be telling the truth. 

But if his reply is shallow, too shallow, you don’t even know what to make of it; then it is possible he is just trying to hook up. He doesn’t want a relationship. 

Related: 15 Signs He’s Using You and Nothing More

3. He is a Woman Magnet

One thing you will find amongst hookers is that they seem to have that woman magic. Since they have been into the game for a while, they know how to play it—and they do play it. 

He is going to be a confident, very well-dressed, cool person, and every woman is going to have eyes for him. If he is with you, you will find their eyes on him all the time. 

And worse, he isn’t going to just sit there. He is also going to be actively flirting with them too. 

4. He Compliments Just Your Looks

People compliment what they want to own themselves. So, when you find a man complimenting nothing other than your looks, then it is an indicator that he only wants a hook up kinda thing going with you. 

I mean, think about it. There are a thousand and one things to compliment about you. Your eyes. Your smile. The way you laugh. Your personality. Etc. 

Of all this, he chooses to compliment just your looks? Ah. Weird. He only wants to sleep with you.

Read: How to Know If He is Committed Phobic

5. From Nowhere, a Conversation About Sex

Hooker guys are very excellent conversationalists. They sure know how to twist and turn conversations, making subtle changes you might not even notice. 

If you’re conversing with a guy and then, out of nowhere, he brings sex up, especially if the friendship or relationship is just starting, then you should know he is only looking for a hook up. 

He will want to find out your kinks, and he will want to know what sex position you love and might even pry into knowing when last you had sex. 

All of these are big red flags, and you should not be blind to them.

6. He Likes It When You Are Drunk

A guy who likes you and wants something more than just a one-night stand won’t like it very much to see you drunk, and especially not often. 

On the contrary, a guy who wants to hook up with you will love it when you are both drunk or tipsy. 

He realizes that when you both are drunk, there is a high chance that something is going to happen. He will invite you to house parties and spend a lot of time with you at the bar. 

Related: 20 Ways to differentiate a Genuine Guy From a Player

7. Too Much Fire, Too Much Effort

Guys who are just about to hook up with you are clear about what they want. They want to hook up, and so they will do all that is necessary to have you sleep with them. 

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For the first few days after you first meet them, expect a perfect guy who is flawless—or at least presents himself to be. 

He will not mind staying up late at night texting you. He will share his playlist with you. He will listen to you talk about anything and will give you just the reaction you need. 

He’ll be perfect. And it is going to be obvious that he is trying too hard. 

8. He Completely Disregards the Touch Barrier

The touch barrier is most concrete in the early stages of relationships. You wouldn’t want a stranger touching you, would you? And the stranger wouldn’t want to be embarrassed, so he will certainly keep his hands to himself. 

Guys who want to hook up are not just ‘normal’ strangers. As mentioned earlier, they are confident and sexy and know that women won’t treat them normally. 

So, they will break the touch barrier quite early. It is not surprising to see a guy who only wants to hook up holding a lady’s waistline the first time he meets her. 

9. Your Red Flags Mean Nothing to Him

Everyone has red flags, including you. Red flags scare everyone but the guy who wants to hook up with you. Of course, he knows he won’t have to keep up with them, at least for long, so he is going to act cool like he doesn’t care until he sleeps with you. 

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You could literally yell at his face, and he will be unfazed. He may even turn around to apologize for ‘making you angry.’

10. Rather Than Flinch, He is Fascinated

This is where you open up about what you love to do in bed. Where you both share your wildest stories—he tells you the wildest things he has done, and you tell him yours. 

Normally, most guys will be scared by a woman who has explored so much of her sexuality, but the guy who wants to hook up won’t. 

You can tell him about that one time you cheated on your ex, and he will praise you for it. He will be totally unbothered about it. 

11. You Think He is In a Relationship

It is true that even guys who are already in relationships hook up once in a while. This is especially true if his relationship is a long-distance relationship

The dynamics are easy to point out. He loves his woman. But she is too far away, and he can’t help but satisfy his sexual needs. 

Ask him about his relationship. He might lie, so look out for signs that suggest that he is. If he was taken aback by the question and took too long to answer it, he is most likely lying to you. 

12. You Don’t Know His Friends

A guy who wants to hook up with you won’t let you know his friends even when you both have been talking for a while. And this may be happening for a number of reasons. 

Most likely, his friends know about his actual girlfriend, and he is trying to preserve his reputation by keeping you off. Or he just doesn’t want you to get the “Oh, he has brought another one” stare from them. 

Guys give that stare a lot. So when next you are around a guy and his friends, pay attention to how they look at you and try to sniff out any whispering. 

13. He Asks You to Come Over

Every guy who is just hooking up will do this sooner or later. With most, it is sooner. Not later. Days into the friendship, or into when the rapport has been established, he is going to ask to have you over. 

He will make the offer feel so tempting and will sure throw in a thing or two that suggest it is just a ‘meeting.’ 

It might sound something like: “Hey, do you want to stop by my house for some drinks and a book reading?” Innocent invite, right?

14. He Practices ‘No Contact” Quite a lot

No contact is a technique of withdrawing so that your attention becomes more valuable. When a guy who wants to hook up with you senses that you may just be friend-zoning him, he will go no contact. 

He will text you late and reply to your messages slower so that you reach out to him and ask what is going on. 

15. He is Hitting on Your Friend Too

Watch how he acts when your friends are around and if there’s flirting or sexual tension between them. A guy who is hitting on your friend is only trying to hook up with you.

Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on Unsplash

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By Martin Corden

Martin Corden is a certified relationship expert and a songwriter from Australia. He loves researching and writing. Martin loves finding new ways to improve and inspires others to be their best version and work together towards it. Martin has a wide range of intellectual and artistic interests.

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