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How to Make Online Dating Work

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Online dating is getting popular every day. While many people have found their spouses via social networking services, some have not been lucky with online dating. 

Some found out that the kind of partner they wanted often didn’t turn up as expected. While online dating may work for some, it may not work for others.

Online dating apps and websites have a lot of singles who are searching for partners. The apps give you a wide variety of options; you can narrow it down to age, country, interests, language, physical appearance, etc. 

After choosing someone, you still have the opportunity to end it easily if the person doesn’t meet your standard or criteria, probably after learning more about the person. No harm is done. Also, you can chat and make friends easily, even with up to two or more people simultaneously, and make your choice from them. 

Facebook is one of the most popular online platforms today, it is free, and you can easily meet new people from anywhere in the world. Many social media services require that you pay a subscription fee to meet someone. 

Hence, whatever one you use, one thing remains the same, the people are all strangers. It doesn’t matter where you meet them; the same applies when you meet someone in real-life situations. 

The only difference is that someone from a social network can easily pretend to be someone they are not, unlike those you meet face to face. 

Here are 10 helpful suggestions on making your online dating work out. 

1. First Impression 

This involves how you set up your social media profile. The way you set it will have an impact on the way others perceive you. 

Put an excellent profile picture because your picture is what draws people to your profile in the first place, so make sure the profile picture is perfect. Your profile can speak a lot about you. 

People also look for things such as, if you are a smoker or want to have kids, and stuff you may be interested in like cooking, sports, music, movies, etc. 

Lastly, always proofread everything before you update it on your profile. Your profile is a key to making online dating work. 

2. Think about what you want

Think about what you really want before you begin online dating. Consider the height, body type, hair, and other external features. What, exactly, are you looking for? 

Also, think about what personalities you are looking for in your dream date. Create a list and be as specific as possible. 

Part of making your list is defining what you want. Doing this can help you narrow down your search when you look through the profiles. Better than chatting up everyone that comes up. 

3. Conversation Starter

Before you send a message to anyone, it would be best to go through their profile. Find out what kind of person they are. 

Then start with a good opening line. Interesting topics you can discuss may include—weather, food, sports, etc. A little joke would be nice too. Also, this will set you guys off on the right foot. 

Read: 10 Best Conversation Starters for Men That Really Work Wonders

4. Keep everything short and interesting 

Keeping everything short and exciting, especially during the first couple of days, is essential if you want your online date to work out fine. 

Don’t over-empathize and dwell on one topic for a very long time. The conversation should be sweet, making the person long for more. The first day is not the time to talk so much about your past. Keep the conversation short and exciting.  

5. Be honest

Being honest while chatting with someone, even if they are hundreds or thousands of miles away, is essential if you want to make the relationship work out in the long run.

Assuming you’re not honest from the beginning and your date later realizes you’ve lied, they won’t respect you anymore. 

Over the long haul, being honest about what you’re all about, what you want, and where you’ve been will make your date respect you as a straight shooter. 

There won’t be statements such as—you said your favorite color is blue, you don’t like potatoes, you said you want three kids and not one. Be straight from day one, and this will make your online dating work. 

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6. Plan to meet up

Make arrangements to see each other. So the relationship can become more real. Listen attentively and be open-minded when you meet. 

You could waste days or even weeks getting to know someone online and then be dumbfounded at the sight of the person. And then, the spark won’t be there anymore.

On top of all that, if you spend too much time getting to know each other online before meeting up, you’d likely build big expectations about them. 

What if this person is different from what you expect? Meet up as soon as possible. Don’t wait too long. 

7. Respond on time

An essential key to making online dating work is to respond quickly, or the person may lose interest. If your online date is sending you messages, they may also be writing others as well. 

Playing the waiting game is no fun. If you take too long to respond to chats, the person will assume you’re not serious and then move on to concentrate on someone else.  

8. Watch out for online liars

There are subtle ways to spot an online liar. Watch out for inconsistencies. Are the words and behavior of the person involved consistent with their own baseline reactions when truthful? Be conservative and do everything you can to protect yourself. If your gut tells you someone is lying, listen to your gut.

9. Do video calls

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Don’t rely on text messages and pictures alone. The internet offers a seemingly endless supply of people who are single and looking to date, as well as tools to filter and find what you’re looking for. 

Video call helps you get a good observation of the person you plan to spend your life with. You hear them personally, get a sense of what the person really is. Besides, pictures can be edited—to appear beautifully. Live videos can not be edited easily like pictures. Videos are more authentic.  

10. Keep realistic expectations

Don’t put your hopes high when you meet someone online. Think of each date as an opportunity to meet someone new and possibly learn something new. 

If it goes wrong, you can do it again. But if it works out well. Congrats, you have found your special one. Be calm. Take things one step at a time. 

Bottom Line

Online dating isn’t for the faint of heart or those easily discouraged, says Harry Reis, Ph.D., Professor of Psychology and Dean’s Professor in Arts, Sciences, and Engineering, at the University of Rochester. “There’s the old saying that you have to kiss a lot of frogs to find a prince — and I think that really applies to online dating.”

Following the guidelines outlined in this article can help you make the right choice for online dating.

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By Martin Corden

Martin Corden is a certified relationship expert and a songwriter from Australia. He loves researching and writing. Martin loves finding new ways to improve and inspires others to be their best version and work together towards it. Martin has a wide range of intellectual and artistic interests.

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