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The Difference Between Real Love and Infatuation

by | Meeting People, Moving On

Oct 20, 2019

Want to know if it is real love or infatuation? Real love grows stronger with time, while infatuation reaches a state of extreme excitement within a short time and then fades. 

Unlike real love, infatuation moves very fast and makes you want to get things done quickly. It gives you that sexual urge to want to sleep with someone almost immediately after you meet them. 

So, what does real love mean? What exactly is an infatuation? To better understand real love and infatuation, read on to find out!

What is Infatuation?

Infatuation is usually what you see and how you feel about someone. This is an intense but short-lived passion or admiration for someone or something. 

It also involves having romantic feelings towards someone, which can quickly change before you know it. 

The problem with infatuation is that it always seems like love at first. But the truth is, it’s not real love; instead, it’s how you feel at the moment, and it can quickly fade away just as easily as it comes. 

Read: 10 Signs He Loves You by His Kiss

Signs Someone is Infatuated, Not In Love

  • They shower you with compliments and sexual comments
  • They exhibit compulsive and addictive behaviors
  • They only talk about their own feelings and desires—not so concerned about yours.
  • They move in on you fast and furious.
  • They promise the moon. 

What is Real Love

Real love is what you know about someone, which grows with time. This happens when you and someone are kind to one another, have the same goals and perspective, and look out for each other’s interests. 

When it’s genuine love, you treat each other with the respect you deserve and trust each other.

Real love is also different from attraction because attraction is what you see, while infatuation is how you feel. 

It depends on what you know. Below are two things to look out for to know if it is real love or infatuation.

Qualities to look out for in “Real Love.”

1. Goal-oriented

A good relationship always includes commitment. Both parties aim to help and always be there for each other.

In real love, both partners aim to grow together and are strong and supportive of each other.

Read: 5 Things A Man Will Do Only If He Really Loves You

2. Trustworthy

A trustworthy person will show they care for you. A partner who tells you they know best and don’t know how you feel isn’t someone you can trust.

3. Pleasant Personality

Someone who has a pleasant personality has genuine love. They can love others without expecting something in return. 

4. Good Conduct

Having good conduct means respect. When a person loves you for real, he always maintains respect for you. Mutual respect is essential to a good relationship. An infatuated person hardly exhibits that for long.

Read: Should I Believe in Love?

5. Considerate 

Real love is always considerate of others. Someone who is infatuated is not considerate of their partner. They are only after what they want to get out of the relationship.

6. Emotional Stability

Emotional stability refers to a person’s ability to remain stable and balanced. An infatuated person is usually not stable and balanced.

7. Reasonable

A truly loving person is reasonable. They see things from your own point of view. Instead of making early conclusions, they listen to you carefully before acting. 

See also: How To Make Online Dating Work.

By Martin Corden

Martin Corden is a certified relationship expert and a songwriter from Australia. He loves researching and writing. Martin loves finding new ways to improve and inspires others to be their best version and work together towards it. Martin has a wide range of intellectual and artistic interests.

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