Behaviors that kill a relationship, especially at the beginning of a relationship, are talking nonstop about your ex, poor personal hygiene, and embarrassing drunkenness. These are situations that can make one suddenly loses attractiveness for the other. They are the biggest love killers. Now, let’s take a deeper look at some of the most common relationship killers.
13 Behaviors That Kills Relationship Faster
1. Being unreliable
If anything is devastating in a relationship, it is the loss of trust. And this doesn’t start with the classic infidelity, but with the small things, like always being late for appointments, forgetting commitments, saying that you will do something, and then not keeping the promise.
A relationship is based on mutual trust. Your spouse or partner needs to know that they can count on your support when needed and that they can trust you. Otherwise, the initial spark will be gone, and thus, kills the relationship.
2. Obstructionist behavior
When you make a wall, and close all forms of communication. As much as the other person tries to break through this wall and reestablish the flow of communication, they lack a hint of surrender or empathic understanding. Even if there is a reason for this closure, it is absolutely useless once a certain limit is exceeded and can ruin a relationship faster. Only communication solves them.
3. Poor hygiene.
Both genders agree on the question of the most repulsive behavior: For the majority of respondents, it would be an absolute no-go if their partner neglected their own hygiene. Women, in particular, find unbrushed teeth and an intense smell of sweat in the opposite sex as bad. But also for men, a neglected partner would be the love killer number one.
4. Stay on the defensive.
How often do we make mistakes or forget important things, and instead of admitting it, we always look for excuses? If it becomes constant in our behavior, our partner may get bored sooner or later and decide to end the relationship. Instead of saying, “no, I didn’t get gas because you forgot to remind me,” it would be better to say, “you’re right, I forgot, and I’m sorry, please let’s go together.
5. Threatening your partner
Even the most loving relationship can escalate into a grueling fight between enemies. Never threaten your partner and never behave in a way that scares, intimidates, or torments him. You can get to extreme behavior when you have tried for too long to deal with the other in civilized ways without getting any result because helplessness makes you feel bad, and in the absence of results, it pushes you to hurt.
6. Drunk and embarrassed
About a third of those surveyed think it turns off when their partner gets drunk and then misbehaves. When it comes to alcohol consumption, most of them expect restraint from their partner. However, men find such slip-ups a little worse than women.
7. Criticisms and negative corrections
When you criticize insistently about things that hurt your loved one or give them the idea of being wrong or worse still will hurt and undermine emotional stability and therefore create the conditions for an irreversible loss of love.
Instead of saying, “you always arrive late because you prefer to be with your friends than with me,” you would say, “I miss you a lot. I want to be with you more.” Perhaps, this way, the relationship would have a more constructive dialogue.
Or for example, In a group of well-educated people, while everyone was listening intently to your partner as he narrates an exciting story, you interrupted to correct him on a slight mistake in grammar. He will definitely feel embarrassed and displeased. Never belittle or embarrass your partner. (1)
8. Torn and dirty underwear
What a potential partner wears underneath is very important. If torn or dirty underwear comes to light under the clothes in passionate moments, about a third of both genders find it anything but sexy. Younger respondents, however, found the underwear problem less disturbing.
9. Individual decisions
When we take a step to start a relationship, many of the decisions we make, directly or indirectly, end up influencing the other person to make more sense to decide together. This will also show that the partner that their opinion is important and that we value it.
When you create the habit of making decisions unilaterally, little by little, issues will arise, and the path of both will progressively separate until the day comes when coexistence becomes unbearable.
10. Despise the other
This attitude, in any form, makes the other partner feel like nothing. By expressing this behavior, we take away any value from the other. Despising someone also has adverse effects on health and can lead to a significant increase in physical illnesses. If your partner cooks poorly, instead of saying it sucks, it will help to suggest adding some different spice or trying a different recipe.
11. Superficial communication
We need to talk about our feelings and conflicts every day. Still, if the communication among a couple is simply based on trivial topics, time will play its part on both sides by alienating both and turning them into complete strangers. For a relationship to work, it is not enough to feel mutual attraction; it is also essential to have common interests and not hesitate to talk about anything, especially what concerns us closely.
12. Seeking external alliances
When things don’t go well between two people, adding allies is useless and detrimental. If you have come to a standstill and constantly blame yourself for the same things, and the situation never changes, introducing other people into the scenario will not make the situation any easier or more manageable.
Leave the world outside the door. You are adults and responsible, and you alone know if there is still something to save or if it is too late. It will be best to look for professional help, that is, someone outside your friend cycle and who does not care either for you or for your partner.
13. Belittling the other
Belittling our partner’s victories, abilities, friendships, achievements, and sufferings is undoubtedly one of the greatest wrongs we can do to a human being. It’s one of the major relationship killers. Never taking another person seriously is a particular form and subtle mental cruelty and is an awful sign about those unable to measure themselves against others as equals.
When we’re angry, each of us can think and then say nasty things; from some of these, we can go back, but if the humiliation we have caused is too strong, the relationship can be compromised. Moreover, rarely in this way we arrive at a possible conflict because the other will respond in kind.
Photo by Keira Burton from Pexels
Aleksandra Nico, Psy.D., is a Psychologist and Editorial Assistant for Whatsdalatest who writes about mental health, relationships, human behaviour, and health. Aleksandra is passionate about helping others make well-informed choices to support and improve their physical and emotional well-being.